MeSsAgE fOr ThE dAy I’vE rEtUrnEd

I don’t understand why my daily devotion came right to this message on the day I returned to my homeland. It plays as a reminder yet ministers to me in a deep way how I would respond in the next exciting journey of my life…

April 21, 2008: FEAR or FAITH? Henry & Richard Blackaby
He said to them, “Where is your faith?” - Luke 8:25

We often begin the journey of faith serving God confidently and enthusiastically – and then troubles come and doubts arise. Sometimes our circumstances can look utterly hopeless, but we never know the reality of our situation until we have sought Jesus’ perspective on it. He knows many things we don’t and He has power that we can’t imagine.
Furthermore, it’s foolish to be discouraged or afraid when Jesus is next to us to calm, to reassure, to act, and to graciously remind us that, despite our circumstances, we are still in God’s will. Difficulties don’t necessarily mean that we have missed or misunderstood God’s will, but if we need to make adjustments in our lives, He will let us know.
Remember the disciples being surprised by a storm as they sailed on the Sea of Galilee? Jesus told them to head across the lake (God’s will) – and then came the storm (difficulties). But Jesus was in the boat next to the disciples, and He exercised a power we can’t imagine: Jesus rebuked the wind and waves…
The measure of your faith is revealed during life’s storms. Establishing your life on God’s Word and walking through life with Him bring a security nothing can shake.

GREAT IS THY FAITHFULNESS!

Thuan: I came to the Philippines, bringing with me a precious gift - the promise that God gave in Isaiah 43“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God.”

I did not know what would happen to me in a foreign land since I could not speak a complete English sentence or pronounce words properly. I came because God called me but I was afraid. The first night I arrived here in Manila, my roommate was very enthusiastic in explaining some house rules to me. I listened but I could not understand what he was talking about.

One morning, while all of my classmates were in class, I was alone in the library. I sat there, feeling frustrated, thinking to quit. An admission staff came to me asking why I did not attend the class. I did not know how to answer. I went home feeling so lonely. That place is called “home” but no one could understand me and I could not understand any of them, too. I cried to God and poured my heart to Him. The Lord gently reminded me of His promise in Isaiah 43 again that He would be with me. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God.” Joy overflowed in my heart. A song came to my mouth. Difficulties were still there but at that moment, I had Him who is always faithful to what He has promised.

Three months later, before the English test the Lord led me to change my two-year course Master of Arts (MA) to three-year course Master of Divinity (Mdiv). I agreed but being alone for three years in the Philippines is too long for me. I asked God that He has to bring Esther, my fiancée to the Philippines to study with me. Thank God I passed the English test and was qualified to take Master of Divinity. I then kept reminding God everyday about Esther’s coming to the Philippines and was sure that was God’s will. But Esther did not feel the same. She was doing pretty well with her business, making quite good money. Therefore, she did not want to come. I forced her, commanded her, beg her. But none of them worked. So I gave up and completely forgot about it. However, the Lord did not. An event caused Esther to seriously reconsider going abroad for theology studies. When she told me, it was too late for the application at the school. In such a late time, the school never gives admission. But in her cause, the school gave a special consideration. God intervened! Her family was convinced this was from God and allowed her to join me. God is faithful.

In my second year it was so wonderful and romantic going to class with Esther, experiencing His faithfulness in many ways. We were encouraged to get married so that we may better support one another in the ministry. We were allowed to go home to get married last December 2006. The given time was short. As students we did not have any resources for the wedding. We could not do anything for our wedding and, we prepared our wedding by prayers alone. God used many friends to prepare every thing for us. He also provided financial needs for us from many different people. We will just go and attend our own wedding in Vietnam. However, we did not know that it was an opportunity for us to prove that God is faithful in a deeper way and to learn how to respond to crisis.

Esther: I was excited that we’re getting married after 6 years in the relationship. We trusted God’s goodness for a blessed wedding. I did not expect that His goodness would be expressed differently to accomplish His purposes. Since my house is far 1000 kilometers from his house, we need to travel at least 16 hours to get there. And while my family and relatives were about to reach his place, they met an accident. Just thirty kilometers near to his house, the truck they were following malfunctioned and the logs that it was carrying hit my parent’s van. Six people got injured, including my parents. When I first heard the news, I was so shocked. I could not believe it. I could not even cry not believe that the incident happened on my own very wedding. My mother had to be hospitalized for surgery. My father was allowed to attend the wedding ceremony but he could not speak a word or even breathe properly because of three broken rips in his chest. Moreover, it was painful for me to accept that my mother’s face was never the same again after that accident. How could I say that God is faithful in the midst of this painful experience? Is this really a blessed wedding for me? However, my husband gently told me, “I know we have a lot of questions in mind about this incident but let us try to think what we can thank God through this?” so, I paused for a while, being silent before God in remembering from the day we started preparing for this wedding, thankfulness overflowed in my heart. I started to cry, I do not know why at that moment! I just wept literally. Three things I surely could thank God came to my mind. First, traditionally, my husband and I should travel with my family but we asked their permission to leave one day ahead that’s why we were not in the van during the accident. Second, my grandma who is 84 years old now wanted to join the wedding but she stumbled 2 days before my wedding, that’s why she stayed back and avoided from the accident. If she was in the van, she must have died. Third, even though the accident might cause 4 or 5 people to die but God protected all, no one died because if it had ever happened, our wedding definitely could not proceed then. My husband asked me to pray aloud a thanksgiving prayer. We cried and asked for His peace and His help so that we can see Him in this incident. Thanking God and acknowledging His sovereignty we declared His faithfulness before hundreds of guests attending our wedding. Many of them are nonbelievers.

Those who attended our wedding said that God used our faith in Him to turn sufferings into blessings. However, the process to fully praise God in trials and sufferings is not fast and easy at all. I returned to the Philippines to continue my study. I dared not think about that incident, afraid that I would complain to God thus making Him sad because of repeatedly questioning why He allowed it to happen. However, when I studied about God’s attributes, I was finally convinced that GOD is FAITHFUL and GOOD. I understand personally that His goodness is not defined by human terms. The sufferings we went through were His plan to accomplish His purpose for each one of us in my family. Certainly, His purpose is always perfect. We have become more humble and dependant on Him after that incident. Truly, I was not mistaken in choosing to trust in His faithfulness. We praised Him for He remains faithful even if we could not understand.

"All things work for our good though sometimes we don’t see how they could. Struggles that break our hearts in two sometimes blinded to the truth. Our Father knows what’s best for us His ways are not our own. So when your pathway grows dim and you just don’t see Him, remember you’re never alone.

God is too wise to be mistaken God is too good to be unkind. So when you don’t understand when you don’t His plan when you can’t trace His hand trust His heart.
He sees the master plan and He holds our future in His hand so don’t live as those who have no hope for our hope is found in Him. We see the present clearly but He sees the first and the last and like a tapestry He’s weaving you and me to someday be just like Him.

God is too wise to be mistaken God is too good to be unkind. So when you don’t understand when you don’t His plan when you can’t trace His hand trust His heart. He alone is faithful and true He alone knows what is best for you. (TRUST HIS HEART)"

MY SALVATION TESTIMONY

MY EVERLASTING HOPE

Have you ever been in despair? It was a terrible experience in my life!

I was born in a religiously diverse family. My grandfather was a Confucian and my grandmother was an ancestor worshiper. My father was an atheist and my mother was a Buddhist. Following our mother, my five siblings and I went to the Buddhist pagoda regularly. So, we obviously had no relationship with Christ and Christianity, and because of these reasons, I did not like Jesus. In fact, when I was about 2 years-old, while playing with my older brother I fell down from the bed to the ground and became unconscious for few hours. My grandmother who was a very strong ancestor worshipper found out that one old lady, a spinster who had a very far relationship with me died but no one worshipped her so her spirit caught my life. Knowing that from a sorcerer, my grandmother built an altar and worshipped that spirit on behalf of me and I was alive again.

I had a prosperous life in our remote mountain village. My parents lived kindly, so, during my childhood, I was safe under their care and love. I thought my life just was smooth. However, trouble began occurring when my grandfather got cancer. We sold all our property to heal him but he died, leaving us with poor. Since then, quarrels some times occurred in my family. We worked hard to maintain our status as well-to-do family, but could not. I soon realized how disappointing that was, and began searching for hope.

Not long after that, my father was arrested because he refused to receive bribe to sell the forest in our hometown. He was sentenced to three years in prison. As a 14 year-old girl with 4 younger, very young brothers and sister, my darkest time really came then. We were so poor that we ate rice with salt for long time. We intensified our prayers to Buddha and ate vegetarian food more than usual, hoping that Buddha would save us.

However, many other troubles came. To my horror, my mother became seriously sick and my older brother began going with bad friends and causing many problems. Those were my horrible days. I both studied and shared my mother’s burden by doing various kinds of hard work, such as: selling food in markets and streets, serving at bus stations, and working on the fields. I lived such a miserable and hopeless plight.

After that, my father was released but our situation was not better and we could not live in our place any more. So, we moved to a city, hoping to survive. And yet, different from our expectations, we fell into unemployment, famine, debt, and lived in a miserable rental slum dwelling. My father could not suffer the situation any longer; so he returned to our hometown and left us in the city. We were such despair that many times we wanted to commit suicide to end our miserable lives, and my mother ever tried to kill herself but she did not succeed.

We tried to cling to each other in a bad rental room until we could not pay monthly rental; then we had no place to live. After wandering overnight, we sat down on the rubbish area. My mother comforted us: “After a storm comes a calm. Tomorrow is another day. Tomorrow will come. . . The brightness will come. . . ” I asked her: “Mommy, but when will be our tomorrow? When? ” In the gloomy darkness, I knew she was crying.

Finally, “tomorrow” came. One old man shared with me about the hope of life found through Jesus’ salvation. He said that Jesus cared my entire burden and if I came to Him and brought Him my burdens and misery, Jesus would carry them for me all. I was like a drowning person grasping for a life boat. He was just a one-week old believer. He also lived with us in the same place, experiencing the same despair and misery but I saw something change in his life. He looked more happy, optimistic, and peaceful. In my mind, I had a concept that Jesus must be very powerful that could change his life. Though I did not understand clearly who Jesus was and how he could share my burden, I willingly accepted Jesus with three other members in my family. I wished I would to be like that old man, experiencing joy and peace.

Truly, Jesus was my “tomorrow.” He was the true and eternal hope for which I was longing. I invited Jesus come into my heart and offered my entire burden. I told Him that I no longer wanted to die; but, from now on, I desired to live in order to discover who He is and experience how good He is. I also asked His forgiveness for worshipping other gods but not Him. The four of us promised together from that very moment, we would worship Him only. Also on that very night, we threw out of our house the idols of two gods that we were worshipping, one is the god of money and another is the god of soil.

I will never forget the unusual hope filling each of our hearts at that moment. Actually, I can not explain why I experienced that unusual feeling but I just had faith that Jesus was in my heart and that He would bring me a new life. Even though I did not know how He would help us, I trusted in Him absolutely. I told my mother that Jesus was so real, unlike Buddha. We all agreed that we did not experience anything when we prayed to Buddha but right that night after praying to Jesus, the overwhelming joy poured out over us. We eagerly planned how we could attend Christian meetings to know more about Him and we also discussed the best way to share this good news to my father who was hard-hearted with his atheism.

Miraculously, God started His good works through our lives to unify us in one faith. During next six months, seven others in my family, one by one, received Jesus, including my father. Jesus became the God that my whole family worshipped and adored, since He is the source of all true hope for us. I still remember the overwhelming joy that I experienced when I led my grandmother in the prayer to receive Christ. And on that very night, in the name of Jesus I destroyed most of the altars in our house, including the altar of my grandfather. Later on, we destroyed also the altar of the old lady spirit that my grandmother was worshipping on my behalf.

God helped us to face all of difficulties by His strength. My whole family sat down together, prayed to Him, and shared our troubles. Amazingly enough, God provided us a place in the city to do our business. Therefore, we not only could live but also pay our debt.
Furthermore, He changed each of us in different wonderful ways. My father enjoyed his work and cared for my family, my mother got strength from God to do her job, and my brother, he left his bad friends.

Though some financial troubles remained, we absolutely trusted in God’s help. Though we lived in any places and circumstances, His hope dwelled in our hearts. We knew for sure that He had a wonderful plan for us. Therefore, we lived hopeful and meaningful lives.

After our conversion 3 years, we returned to our hometown and my family was the first members of the first church established in the area since we were the first fruits of the gospel there. We are now a pastoral family with all of memebers having heart for God's work. We will be always grateful about the day that God came, touched our lives, and bestowed His mwercy upon us.

Jesus Christ came and shined the light of hope in my life. Living in Him, despair turned to hope; as it says in the Bible, “In His great mercy, He has given us new birth into a living hope (I Peter 1:3).

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For the video of the testimony, click in http://karisphan.multiply.com/video/item/93/My_everlasting_hope

It was recorded during my sharing opportunity in CCF, Philippines. And here are some pictures which may show you our family's transfomation.

Six of us in 2001 (I am the second)

In 2002
In 2003
In 2004
In 2005